52 life story questions to ask a parent or grandparent
One question a week for a year. Free to use any way you like: at the kitchen table, on a phone call, or with a voice recorder. Print this page and keep it by the phone.
Before you start
- There are no wrong answers. Skip any question. Talk as long or as short as you like.
- Talking is easier than writing for most people. Tell it like you'd tell a grandchild at the kitchen table.
- You never need to include your full date of birth, Social Security number, account numbers, or passwords. Those don't belong in a life story, and scammers look for them.
- Some memories (a first pet, an old street, a parent's family name) are also common bank security questions. It's fine to share the memory without the name, or to keep the finished book private to family.
- Your words stay your words. If a family member helps write it down, ask them to keep your way of saying things.
Chapter 1: Where you come from
- What do you know about where your family came from before you were born?
Who told you those stories? Is there a family legend people still repeat? - Tell me about your mother. What was she like?
What did she do all day? What did she say that you still hear in your head? - Tell me about your father. What was he like?
What did he care about most? What do you wish you'd asked him? - Who else was part of the household when you were little?
Brothers, sisters, grandparents, boarders, a favorite aunt? - What did your family do together when there was free time?
Sunday dinners, radio shows, church, card games, visiting relatives?
Chapter 2: Childhood
- What is the very first thing you remember?
How old were you? What can you still see, hear or smell? - Describe the home you grew up in, room by room.
Where did you sleep? Where did everyone gather? What was outside the window? - What games did you play, and who did you play with?
Were you the leader, the follower, or off on your own? - Tell me about a pet or animal you loved.
What made it special? Any funny or sad story about it? (You don't need to use its name.) - What were the holidays like when you were a child?
Which one was your favorite, and what food was always on the table? - When did you get in trouble as a kid, and what happened?
Did you deserve it? Did anyone find out what really happened?
Chapter 3: School days
- What was school like for you?
How did you get there? How big was it? What did it smell like? - Which teacher do you remember most, and why?
What did they say or do that stayed with you? - What were you good at, and what did you struggle with?
Did anyone notice or help? - Who were your closest friends growing up?
What did you do together? Are you still in touch with any of them? - What was your first job or way of earning money as a kid?
What did you buy with it?
Chapter 4: Growing up and heading out
- What did you want to be when you grew up?
What happened to that dream? - What music, dances, clothes or slang were popular when you were a teenager?
What did your parents think of it? - When did you first feel like a grown-up?
Was it a moment, a job, a move, a loss? - Tell me about leaving home for the first time.
Where did you go? Who drove you, or did you go alone? How did it feel? - Did you serve in the military, go to college, learn a trade, or go straight to work?
What was a typical day like? Who did you meet there?
Chapter 5: Work and making a living
- What kinds of work have you done in your life?
Which job did you like most? Which one taught you the most? - Describe a normal day at the job you spent the most time in.
What time did you start? What did you carry? Who did you see? - Who was the best boss or coworker you ever had?
And the hardest one to work with? - What are you proudest of from your working life?
Did anyone ever thank you for it? - How did money work in your family?
Were there lean years? Good years? What did that teach you?
Chapter 6: Love and partnership
- How did you meet the people who mattered most in your love life?
What did you notice first? - Tell me about a memorable date or courtship story.
Where did you go? What did it cost back then? - If you married, tell me about the wedding day.
Who was there? What went wrong? What went right? - What made your closest relationship work, and what was hard about it?
What advice would you give a young couple today? - What is something about love that you understand now but didn't at twenty?
Chapter 7: Home and family life
- If you had children, tell me about the day each one was born or came into your life.
Where were you? Who called whom? - What was a regular weeknight like in your home when the house was busiest?
Who cooked? What was on TV? What were the rules? - What family traditions did you keep or start?
Which ones do you hope continue? - What recipes or dishes is your family known for?
Who taught you? Will you share how to make one? - What is a favorite story about one of your children or grandchildren?
Have you ever told them?
Chapter 8: History you lived through
- What big news events do you remember exactly where you were for?
Who were you with? What did people say? - How has your town or neighborhood changed in your lifetime?
What's gone that you miss? What's better now? - What new invention changed your daily life the most?
Do you remember the first time you used it? - What do young people today not understand about how things used to be?
What do you think they have right?
Chapter 9: Places and adventures
- What is the best trip you ever took?
Who went? What happened that you didn't plan? - Tell me about every place you have called home.
Which one felt most like home, and why? - What is the most daring or surprising thing you have ever done?
Would you do it again?
Chapter 10: What you believe
- What role has faith, spirit or a sense of purpose played in your life?
Has it changed over the years? - Who has influenced you the most, and how?
Did you ever tell them? - What are the values you tried hardest to live by?
Where did you learn them? - What is the best advice you were ever given?
Did you follow it?
Chapter 11: Hard times and getting through
- What was one of the hardest times in your life, and how did you get through it?
Share only what you are comfortable sharing. Who helped you? - Tell me about someone you lost and what you remember most about them.
What would you say to them today? - What mistake taught you the most?
What would you tell your younger self?
Chapter 12: Looking back, looking ahead
- What are you most grateful for?
What small, everyday things bring you joy now? - What do you want your grandchildren and great-grandchildren to know about you?
If they read just one page of this book, what should it say?